The reason I can’t have matches…

There’s the front of the house and then…

You know those “no burn” laws?  And those thoughts of, “Somewhere, some idiot…”

Well, don’t look at me.

I blame it all on Mrs. Lillie Mae Seagle.  Go to the top of Smith Hill, around the bend and look left.  There sat a little light green house with a beautiful green yard.  I was jealous of that green grass and I decided to copy her secret.  Nobody told me one match and a windy day made for terrible timing except Daddy, and that was after it was all over. 

You can imagine with my history how many, “I told you so’s”, I have gotten over the years.  I would love to tell you that I am smarter with age, but I believe that to be wishful thinking on my part.

I think I get into less trouble now a days strictly due to the fact that I am a little more tired to carry out my bright ideas.  I  still have them, I just do not get out of the bed to carry them out.  My family is very thankful for that I am sure.

They are threatening to start their own blog and tell their version of my stories, so I will try to stay honest and prevent the “Cheryl Tales” from ever being published. 

About 10 years ago, Jeff says he was coming in tired from work and intended to lay down.  He got out of his truck and saw smoke and walked around the house thankfully or this would be a completely different story. 

The shock of “Cheryl, What Are You Doing?”, booming from Jeff was outweighed by my relief.  I knew I was in trouble, but at that point I did not care, I have never been so glad to see Jeff Dodson come home in my entire life.

I promise it was one match.  I was out in the backyard and you would have thought I put gas on it.  “Whooof”, I still cringe at the memory of the sound. 

My smug bright idea went to “Oh crap, where is the hose?” in 3 seconds flat.  

No hose, no phone, no husband.  Just me and a know it all 3 year old, saying “This was a baaad idea.”  I probably should be ashamed of myself but I turned all my panic in her direction with my, “Get on the patio now!”  

I kinda go blank after that.  I  remember the heat and the fact of all the things you think you will do.  Well, in my case I did none of them.  I remember looking ahead at the direction of the fire and thinking that I have burnt down the neighborhood. 

When we got it out, I wore the shame face over the next few days when people came to look and point.

The kids don’t let me live it down, especially my smart alec 3 year old who surveyed the damage and chimed in, “When DHR sees this, they ain’t gonna let us have no kids.”

Shut up Reagen. 

I know.  Bad mom.  But it is bad when they are right and you gave birth to them.  Just saying. 

On the bright side, the grass was pretty that year.  Mrs.  Lillie Mae would have been proud and she would have laughed.  She had a great sense of humor. 

Especially when she saw the pretty green grass and the back of our house. 

I don’t think it looked that bad…

Don’t laugh, 

Cheryl 

2 thoughts on “The reason I can’t have matches…

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